Chaperone fun

My oldest child, 14 (about to be 15), has his first girlfriend. He obviously wants to spend a lot of time with her and he spends a lot of time texting/talking to her on the phone. This is all new territory for our family. What to do?

We decided that he could ask her on a date, but either his dad or I would be there. CHAPERONE! When my son asked me for dating ideas I drew a blank because I have no clue. What do teenagers do on a date? Especially teens who can’t drive or have a job! He was totally cool with going to an indoor putt putt place at the mall and the dinner.

The tricky part is how to give them sometime to talk by themselves but not allow them to take off by themselves. I am okay with them hanging out but I am not okay with them being unsupervised. The idea hit me…. Don’t actually give him any money to take her out. In order to do anything I have to be with them (I impress me sometimes).

So I am sitting on the bench reading this awesome book called “Daring Greatly” by Brené Brown and waiting for them to decide they are hungry. I hope it’s soon because I am ready to eat!

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Ice Bucket Challenge

Like everyone else I have watched many people take on the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge to raise money and awareness.  I have honestly rolled my eyes at it and thought, “What a silly stunt”.  I started scrolling past them and thought it was just another thing we Americans did to do something stupid.  I didn’t bother to even research what it was.  Then I watched the special on Sports Center regarding Pete Frates and his story.  With tears in my eyes, I saw a young vibrant man overtaken by this horrible disease and then I understood the whole purpose of the challenge.  Sure to raise money but to educate people about it.  What a simple technique!  Pour a bucket of ice cold water over your head while being videotaped, challenge your buddies to do the same, and blam… it takes off!

I felt better and started to enjoy the videos but was thankful no one had challenged me on it UNTIL the other day.  I was challenged by my older brother.  He has picked on me since the day I was born.  Argh!  I am one of those donate quietly kind of people.  I rarely share about things that I do in regards to helping others because I don’t need the glory and I don’t like to boast.  I am not comfortable with it but I know my siblings and they would razz hard core if I didn’t do something.  I chose to take if publicly to avoid sibling razzing.  I’m weak.

I had to wait until my whole family was home to do it because I wanted them all be involved.  I wanted them to know and understand why I was about to pour a bucket of ice cold water over my head.  I had my oldest do the main pouring (I figured he would enjoy that more than he did) and the youngest “help”.  It’s not a flashy video, but I did it and we have donated as well.  I seriously did not grasp how freakishly cold that was going to be.  It takes your breath away for a moment.  If you care to watch it, you can do so HERE.  If not, that’s cool too. Just learn about it and donate if you can.  www.alsa.org

I am thinking there are a lot of subjects that our society need to know about and if pouring a bucket of cold water over their heads educates them, I say open up the faucets and go for it!

 

 

 

 

Parent Pouting Party

Parenting. Hands down one of the hardest things I have ever done. Most days are pretty good. There are minor things that come up and have to be addressed but mostly it is pretty good. The past three days have not been like this. It’s actually been extremely difficult.

Tonight my 14 year old is going on his first group “date”. I like that it’s a group situation but he is still nervous and honestly, so am I. It’s like sending out your kid into the world and hoping that all of the good lessons and manners you have been teaching him will actually stick with him. I hope he makes the right decisions and doesn’t act like a complete goob. His humor is different than most and he has a tendency to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. This is a test for him. It should be an easy test considering I will be at the same exact place but “minding my own business” (not really but don’t tell him). I am anxious for him.

At the same time, my 4 year old has decided that this is the week he will push every single button I own. He will test me to every limit and honestly, he has succeeded. He has visited the naughty chair more times that I can count and is currently learning what “grounded” means. He has lost all TV time for the next two days. He loves TV and he is not taking to this well. The battle that is waging is stressful and I hate the tension that has overtaken our home. I don’t tolerate naughty talk, hitting, kicking, throwing, and purposefully going out of his way to be disobedient. He did every single one of these things TODAY.

It’s tough. I love these boys with my entire heart. I would give them the moon if it was the right thing to do, but it’s not. Parenting isn’t giving your kid everything they want or justifying their actions for them. It’s disciplining when they need it. It is following through on threatened punishments when an undesired action plays out. It’s feeling like crap because you spent most of the day trying your best to keep it all together and keeping calm in the midst of the storm only to explode in to a million pieces and falling apart. It’s asking for forgiveness when you do fall apart. It’s hugging your child to let them know that even though they are in trouble they are so so so very loved and wanted. It’s encouraging your oldest and letting him know that everything will be okay and that I have faith in who he is. It’s also giving him a little extra money so he can pay for the girl’s dinner if he feels compelled to.

It’s been a tough day and not one where I want to repeat any time soon. It’s one of those days where you think that a long weekend away would restore your soul. It’s one of those days where you pout all by yourself, in the bathroom with the door locked because that is as close as you are going to get to a quiet get away. It’s also one of those days where I sit back and focus on the good days that we have had. This is a cruddy day and all parents have them. As my Mom always tells me, “This too shall pass” and I know she is right, but for now… I am going to pout.

Turn it up!

I have been awake since 3:30 AM and I am currently in the stupid stage. The stage where I find everything funny and do stupid stuff. I know the crash is coming and it’s going to be awful. I’ve got peppermint & wild orange diffusing but it’s going to take a little more than that to keep me moving. I did the second best thing… I turned on my iTunes radio and found a fun station. I geekily chose the “boy band” station because I can not lie… I loved New Kids on the Block, N’sync, 98 Degrees, and I’m sure a slew of others that I can’t recall right now.

I have been dancing like a fool and cracking myself up. The looks from my oldest are priceless and my youngest is dancing along with me. I have no clue if this will make the crash worse but for now I am going to jam out to B2K (Bump Bump Bump) because… why not. Turning up music loud has been shown to lift up your mood and keep you energized. I’m hoping it works. Bedtime isn’t for another 2 1/2 hours.